Saturday was another great run for me. I didn't set out on this marathon training to hit new personal records in each race, but it seems to be happening. I wasn't as fast in this 10 miler as the first two shorter races, but that was by design. I averaged 12.5 minute miles to finish in 2 hours and 5 minutes. That's five minutes less time than last year's race. And it was in the middle of a windy day, with a rainstorm in the middle. It felt really good though. And we did about 3 miles to start before the race.
It's an amazing feeling to push yourself beyond what you thought possible. And so far the pain in the knee is manageable. I'm staying on top of it and keeping myself stretched and doctored up. I think it helps to not run as many hills too.
But today I'm starting to feel it a bit. I have to run six in the morning, but as I sit here tonight, I'm exhausted. I feel the muscles aching. I just want to curl up on my couch and have someone bring me food and drink. But I'm going to head home (hopefully soon if the editors can focus long enough to finish my story) and slug up and down the steps to do laundry and figure out my own dinner situation.
It's ok. This is my life. I take care of myself and rely on the support of friends and family to keep encouraging me that I'm doing the right things. I really rely on that support. I'm counting on the kind words of encouragement. And sometimes they come from the unlikeliest of places. Today a co-worker -- someone I don't talk to or see that often -- came up to me and handed me $50 to give to the walk. It was great. And what was even better is that he was totally interested in what I'm doing and encouraging about it.
I never thought I'd be able to raise more than $4,000 in three months -- and more coming with fundraisers still planned and other donations still coming in. I never thought I'd be this ok with being on my own again. But the truth is, I'm happy with who I am. I would love to have someone to share it with -- but I'm ok with myself.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Spring has sprung
As I get older, time just seems to speed up. I've been thinking that I owe myself (and anyone who reads this) a blog entry. But every day seems to end without one getting written. But, when I realized the last time I posted was nearly two months ago, I couldn't believe it.
So here we go. I'm going to try to get back in the blogging routine. I'm no less busy, probably more so these days. But I'm going to try for at least once a week. We'll see how it goes.
These past two months have flown by ... filled with life lessons, laughter, tears and a whole bunch of monotonous work in between. Someday -- hopefully April 11 -- you guys will be able to read the series of stories that have occupied much of my time over the past couple months. I'm not giving away much, but I'm very proud of them. I hope you will enjoy them.
I feel happier than I have in a long time, which is a weird feeling because it continues to mingle with a lot of anxiety and worry in my life too. But it's to be expected. Mostly I just feel an overwhelming sense of pride in myself that I've been able to manage all the daily stuff while keeping some fun in my life. There are a lot of things that could have sidelined me into an abyss of sadness and depression -- but it hasn't happened that way. It's a major accomplishment actually.
I've been running -- 15 miles logged so far this week with a big race and extra miles slated for Saturday. Woo-hoo. The fundraising has been amazing. So many thanks to give out to my friends ... and there are thank you cards in the works too.
Derby is quickly approaching and that is always great fun coupled with a lot of work.
It's just one of my favorite times of the year. This morning as I ran, I couldn't help noticing the daffodils on the side of the path. The buds springing up on the trees. The smell of spring in the air. It always makes me hopeful. That feeling is growing inside of me that good things are coming.
But part of what I realized today is that there are good things now ... not just those that await me. I could be sad that I don't have someone to go home to after a day of writing about a kid shot while playing with a gun with his brother. Or I can be grateful that I had a friend willing to go to dinner with me and let me debrief about it. I could be sad that my dad is starting chemo again next week in anticipation of his bone marrow transplant. Or I can be grateful that he's found an anonymous 23-year-old donor who is giving him a shot at a cure.
These are my choices. I choose gratitude. It's a much healthier, happier way to deal with things. It's the way Spring itself would handle it I think.
And it's amazing how when you choose this path, the universe (God, whatever you believe in) brings so much wonderful stuff into your life. In the past couple months, I've had full friendships and met new people I hope will become strong friends. I've won an award from my company -- for a story I pushed and worked my butt off to get (along with Marcus). I've gotten some freelance work. I've planned my trip to San Diego for the marathon .... lots of great stuff and some really small victories too.
Anyway ... that's probably enough for now. Feels good to be back at the blog game. : ) Enjoy the sunshine.
So here we go. I'm going to try to get back in the blogging routine. I'm no less busy, probably more so these days. But I'm going to try for at least once a week. We'll see how it goes.
These past two months have flown by ... filled with life lessons, laughter, tears and a whole bunch of monotonous work in between. Someday -- hopefully April 11 -- you guys will be able to read the series of stories that have occupied much of my time over the past couple months. I'm not giving away much, but I'm very proud of them. I hope you will enjoy them.
I feel happier than I have in a long time, which is a weird feeling because it continues to mingle with a lot of anxiety and worry in my life too. But it's to be expected. Mostly I just feel an overwhelming sense of pride in myself that I've been able to manage all the daily stuff while keeping some fun in my life. There are a lot of things that could have sidelined me into an abyss of sadness and depression -- but it hasn't happened that way. It's a major accomplishment actually.
I've been running -- 15 miles logged so far this week with a big race and extra miles slated for Saturday. Woo-hoo. The fundraising has been amazing. So many thanks to give out to my friends ... and there are thank you cards in the works too.
Derby is quickly approaching and that is always great fun coupled with a lot of work.
It's just one of my favorite times of the year. This morning as I ran, I couldn't help noticing the daffodils on the side of the path. The buds springing up on the trees. The smell of spring in the air. It always makes me hopeful. That feeling is growing inside of me that good things are coming.
But part of what I realized today is that there are good things now ... not just those that await me. I could be sad that I don't have someone to go home to after a day of writing about a kid shot while playing with a gun with his brother. Or I can be grateful that I had a friend willing to go to dinner with me and let me debrief about it. I could be sad that my dad is starting chemo again next week in anticipation of his bone marrow transplant. Or I can be grateful that he's found an anonymous 23-year-old donor who is giving him a shot at a cure.
These are my choices. I choose gratitude. It's a much healthier, happier way to deal with things. It's the way Spring itself would handle it I think.
And it's amazing how when you choose this path, the universe (God, whatever you believe in) brings so much wonderful stuff into your life. In the past couple months, I've had full friendships and met new people I hope will become strong friends. I've won an award from my company -- for a story I pushed and worked my butt off to get (along with Marcus). I've gotten some freelance work. I've planned my trip to San Diego for the marathon .... lots of great stuff and some really small victories too.
Anyway ... that's probably enough for now. Feels good to be back at the blog game. : ) Enjoy the sunshine.
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